Geek Love

G and I dressed to impress, hit up Mikes, and then went to the movies.

Playgirl 2013 Geek Edition

Since Margaret and David are taking a break, and Siskel and Ebert are dead, here are some reviews from yours truly. Spoiler alert, I guess.

1) This is the End

Good, really good, but not great. Critical raves aside, I guess my expectations were just a bit too high. I’m still not convinced rape jokes should be a thing … but if they are going to be a thing, they should be left only to comedians of extraordinarily deft ability when it comes to the art of crafting a joke. Such was not the case here. Also, wish there was more Michael Cera in it. Small complaints. Otherwise, a good film worth checking out. I enjoyed it more for its concept and originality than for making me laugh (but it did make me laugh).

2) Star Trek Into Mediocrity

Ooooooooooohhhhhh ........................................................ yeaaaaahhhhhhhh!

Yaawn. Good Star Trek is an exploration of ethics dressed up as dumb action. This film was all dumb action. Nothing really makes sense. Your brain wants to turn off to enjoy said action, but the film is so utterly stupid your brain is forced to scream out to tell you so. They have … still … a transporter that can transport you basically anywhere. But they need to land the Enterprise on a planet and off again so that Spock can play in a volcano … yeah, okay, whatever. I guess it would have made too much sense to use your freakin’ magic transporter. And what a waste to have Robocop and Benedict Cumberbatch as the villains in the same movie. Either one alone is enough to carry a potentially great film; squeezing in both just leaves each with inadequate screen time. And with all due respect to Benedict Cumberbatch, Khan is not some whiny pasty-faced British-sounding emo bitch. Khan is a red hot blooded masculine beast of a man in the form of Ricardo Montalbán pretending to be an East Indian. I’m talking fine Corinthian leather here. To be clear, I’m not faulting Cumberbatch’s acting. There’s only so much one can do with poor writing and mischaracterization. And oh wow, but do they not think much of women: Uhura alternates between annoying constantly angry girlfriend and eye candy, and "Dr" Carol Marcus is there … to take her clothes off. Roddenberry would be rolling over in his grave, you know, if he had been buried. Don’t even get me started on Spock’s emotional outburst (a laugh-out-loud parody of a scene from Wrath of Khan) or the one-too-many oh-look-it’s-yet-another-exotic-looking-Star-Wars-alien moments. The actors are fine, the cinematography is fine, the writing is something you hope to avoid stepping on while walking down the street. Pass.

3) Man of Steel

Ooooooooooohhhhhh ........................................................ yeaaaaahhhhhhhh!

Boy that Spock sure gets around, doesn't he? But I digress.

The newest Superman film is in one sense as much a clusterfuck as the latest Star Trek, with the plot here revolving around central character and Daily Planet staffer, Jenny. God bless young, sweet, brave Jenny. You go girl. Anyway. What is strange is that it somehow works. One reason for this, is that it seems to comprise a vast collection of moments from popular blockbusters of years past: The Matrix, Independence Day, Alien, Aliens, Avatar, The Sixth Sense, etc. Another reason is that there’s this great scene wherein Kevin Costner gets killed for no reason whatsoever. If they put fictional Kevin Costner getting pointlessly killed on replay for like 45 minutes, that's another blockbuster right there (I emphasize fictional here; the man has a family and kids after all). LOTS of sexual innuendo. Clark while atop Lois, relates how he can do things “no ordinary man can do”. Nudge, nudge, wink, wink. Need an array of penis-shaped missiles? Here, have an array of penis-shaped missiles. Clark and Lois fall in love, though they speak for a total of no more than five minutes, which mostly has Clark saying, “Hello Lois. So … did I tell you about the time I let my father die? And watched it happen? True story.” It has some truly great moments too: Superman’s father Maximus rides on the back of a flying dragon. There is a late, great Christopher Reeve digital cameo. Supes indirectly commits genocide. And ultimately, Superman kneels before Zod (as well he should). All in all, a great laugh-out-loud comedy.